Did you know Pretzel had a cousin? She lives far away but they communicate telepathically like all animals. Her name is Beebs! Her real name is Beatrix, just like the character in Kill Bill - although I don't think Uma Thurman is her namesake. Like Uma Thurman, she has many talents. Let's take a look:
Beebs enjoys shredding paper. She briefly worked for Goldman Sachs in from 2008 - 2009.
Like most cats, Beebs can stare straight into your soul. However, she reserves this power for low-stakes poker games and moments when she wants to be left alone in her cat house. The purpose of this house is to remove herself from the house she is already in - you should know this already.
Beebs enjoys looking out the window and wondering. Here she is pondering who she should pick with the 2nd overall pick in her fantasy football draft. Probably Christian McCATfery. Get it? I hope he doesn't get injured week 4 (he will).
Only when Beebs is dressed up does she allow people to call her Beatrix - that's how you know she's fancy. She is seen here being humble and kind. For the moment.
This is also her cousin's favorite way to spend time, which is time well spent. Check it out:
If we didn't have to eat or pee, he would do this all day.
Beebs also used to work as a lawn care equipment specialist. She can be seen here fixing a weed trimmer. Isn't putting that string in a pain in the ass? Not for Beebs. She is very handy.
One thing is for sure: Beebs knows how to rock and roll. It's in her blood.
-Stein
Beebs, you are the coolest cat cousin